关于暑假计划的英语作文

82分
2025-06-30 23:57:15

As the summer vacation is coming,our class made a discussion about its plan,and students had different ideas.

Some students prefer to stay at home.They believe it's convenient for them to do anything they want at anytime,and don't have to worry about what they eat and where they get sleeps for their parents will prepare everything ready.What's more,it won't cost much money for them to stay at home,and their payment is mainly connected with the electricity charges.However,they miss the good chance to get to know the outside world so that they are not able to broaden their field of view.

However,some other students would like to go outside for visits.They think that only in this way can they know more about the world,including the local customs and traditions,by the way,their horizon can be greatly broadened.But the disadvantage is that they have to pay more about the accommodation.

In my opinion,do some proper going out is good for our health and it can help us relax to better meet the new term.

写作思路解析

能够感受到写作时的用心,作者善用反差强烈的反衬手法突出核心主体塑造场景,构思巧妙不落俗套,避开陈旧写作套路,新鲜感持续在线,文字充满温度。场景刻画生动逼真,仿佛身临其境。作者善于感知生活中的细微情绪,把内心感受转化为流畅文字,文风温和治愈。

本文范文仅作写作思路参考,请勿直接照搬抄袭用于作业投稿。

AI作文批改

作文打分:82分(满分100)

作文优点

文字表达简洁有力,剔除多余废话,表意清晰精准。叙事完整,起因经过结果交代清楚,文章逻辑通顺。

改进建议

描写场景时细化动作、神态、环境细节,拒绝笼统概括。梳理情绪变化链条,逐步推进情感转折。写完反复朗读,删减啰嗦语句,让表达更加凝练。

综合点评

文章选材稳妥,能够围绕中心展开叙述,段落划分合理。行文节奏舒缓,适合记叙日常事件。缺少深度思考,感悟大多停留在表面,立意还有上升空间。

存在不足

!开篇吸引力不足,铺垫冗长。全文缺少冲突变化,叙事平淡,阅读趣味性不足。

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